Luxury is not satisfying
Thailand exchange rate being what it is, paying over $100/night at a beachfront resort in Thailand gets you luxury, at least as how I define it. I stay at three such resorts within a week. Each resort is situated on a spectacularly beautiful beach. Each is its own version of perfection.
But despite my swoon-worthy photos, I feel a hollowness. It grows the more I chase fancy meals and the best rendition of a piña colada. Luxury breeds a feeling that you should avoid all suffering and discomfort, and that if you pay just a little bit more you would finally be satisfied. The luxury comes at a cost beyond dollars; my previously limber yoga-ed body feels stiff and puffy.
What we're sold, over and over, is that luxury is happiness. If only we had a nicer house, a newer car, the latest phone, fancy vacations, and more convenience, we would finally be happy.
I am happy to report that this is a lie.
I know this because my next destination is a fitness retreat. I am given a hard mattress with a thin sheet. I wake up early to be booted out the door to a 2.6km run, the only break being 1000 meters of rowing. If only that were the end! No, then comes push-ups, burpees, sit-ups, planks, then another class of Lift All the Things!, and then an hour of yoga. My body is ill-prepared for this heroic endeavor and I become dizzy with exhaustion.
Yet despite all the fatigue, I feel a gleeful joy. I am being pushed to my limit. I am with a group of people united by our elective suffering. I feel a sense of belonging to a tribe. For the first time in months—years!—Twitter has no appeal. I am primordial man, doing hard things, discovering what I am made of.
I sleep like a baby. For someone whose sleep has been petulant, sleep seems like the most exquisite of luxuries.
I realize, of course, that a fitness retreat, too, is luxurious. It is supreme luxury to be able to spend a good portion of your day on personal fitness. But my point here is that luxury as it is sold to us is not satisfying.
I believe what brings satisfaction is accomplishment, authentic relating, and making a difference in others’ lives. All of these require discomfort in their cultivation. None of these can be delivered on a silver platter. All of them are free.